The Ratty

Heide Walsh
From the RMCA web site, June 2003

Once upon a midnight dreary,
The human showed up glass-eyed and bleary,
Seeming unhappy at my loud and raucous chewing.
While they shouted, nearly snapping, suddenly their mind uwrapping,
They seemed to have a fit a-brewing, brewing at my cage's door.
"Tis their joy at my play," I uttered, "happy at my cage's door.
Only this and nothing more."

Presently my teeth grew prouder, as the chewing noise grew louder,
"Sir," said I, "or madam" (for my eyesight is crappy)
"Truly I am pleased to make you happy, happy at my cage's door,
But shouldn't you be asleep?" Here they opened wide the door,
Madness there, and nothing more.

"Treats!" said I, my joy so high,
Though my human enthusiatically swore,
"Despite your being cute and fuzzy, treats you shall not have more,"
"Treats!" I demanded before the door,
Quoth my human,

Startled that my human knave, would deny the treats I crave,
"What!" cried I, "thing of evil! I am quite a creature astute,
I know that you cannot deny a thing so cute!"
Let's have those treats a-coming, coming through my cage's door!"
Angrily returning to night's sleepy shore, getting into bed once more,
Quoth my human,

In loving memory of Bailey, Heide's "chew boy" and inspiration.